Sunday, November 3, 2013

holy cannoli!

So I mentioned in an earlier post that my twins are somewhat exciting to have at preschool. I also mentioned that I was guaranteed a story just about every day...thank heavens they only go three days a week or I might lose my mind.

This week was no different.

Apparently Ryleigh is bullying her sister. I know right???? She's three. But she may be a mite possessive and maybe a mite jealous of her free-loving sister. Apparently, Ryleigh doesn't like it if Kadence sits where she's not, if she plays with other kids, if she participates in other activities. To sum it up: If Ryleigh isn't directing, then Ryleigh isn't happy with Kadence. Awesome....

So Ryleigh has spent a great deal of time on time out. We have also spent a great deal of time discussing respect and love and allowing other people to be their own boss. I'm not sure if her three year old mind grasps everything (I highly doubt it), but I am hoping that small kernels are dropping into her heart. Her heart is the place I'm most concerned about.

So imagine my consternation when I arrive at preschool to pick them up on Wednesday and their teacher rushes over to me and says "I just have to tell you what happened today."

Oh for the love...Really???? I admit, my desire to have well-mannered, well-behaved children and NOT seeing that play out is a huge humble pill for me to swallow. And my mortification is magnified by their teacher's amusement over their antics. She thinks they are hysterical. I think I might become hysterical. The Lord is really having to squash that performance, people pleasing part of me. And frankly, it's a bit uncomfortable.

Apparently Ryleigh didn't like what Kadence was doing and after several minutes of negotiating that didn't go anywhere, Ryleigh hauled off and slugged Kadence. An uppercut to her chin. The same chin, mind you, that was cut open when she was rough housing on the steps at church and fell on Sunday.

oh. wow.

Now I'm pretty sure Ryleigh didn't mean to hit Kadence in her gashed open chin. But I am pretty sure she meant to hit Kadence. On the bright side: At least she didn't hit someone else's kid.

I feel like I am sitting in the principal's office. Every day. I've never been to the principal's office but I'm sure this is what it must feel like. A heart shame. A helpless wrecking. A deep dread.

I have to find the humor on days like these. Because I admit having stories every day is hard on my heart. I thought we had covered the 'no hitting' rule when they were two. Perhaps I was wrong. I thought we had also covered 'no hurting people.' I may have been wrong about that too.  Now that I think about it, maybe I just need to operate from the place where "I was wrong" and start over. Fresh day. New beginnings. Review the biggies. No problem.

I have to say that despite all of the drama, it is a blessing that my girls deeply love each other. They fight like boys fight. There's no grudges or hard feelings. There's no punishment that lasts for days on end. No silent treatment or cold shoulder. (On a side note: I'm sure all of this very dignified and refined 'fighting' will end when they are teenagers. That should be great fun.) Ryleigh hit Kadence. Ryleigh had a consequence. She apologized. And often when one of them apologizes the other one does too. Hugs. Kisses. Off they go. They bury it and they never dig it up. Now if only their too-concerned, over-analytical mama could do the same...

So glad there's always grace.


Grace always Rises,

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